Ask Wendy About Anal Play

by Robert Harmon on May 13, 2020

Ask Dr. Wendy


Home AloneJ

During our hectic and busy lives, we all look forward to having time to ourselves and catch up on things we enjoy. Like I was thinking about when my husband said to me one time, “If you could do three things every day it would be: smoke a joint, masturbate with your vibrator, and take a nap.” Which are all true. However, I do think about different scenes, where many of the rules are bent. When I have free time am not commuting, not rushing around, not always having to be social; opens-up the opportunities to explore fantasies or erotic memories.

Anal play is sometimes thought of as taboo and something, "I would never do". For many couples of all types, anal may add some spice into the relationship. There are nerve endings in the anal area for both men and women, that when stimulated, can be arousing.  For men, massaging the prostate internally can bring their orgasms to the edge of the universe, for women, the stimulation can ultimately hit the g-spot creating sensations never felt before. But, (no pun intended) finesse is involved.

During our lockdown, we made our back deck and hot tub into a nudists’ Shangri-la. We slip into this 8-person blue-lit tub in the moonlight, while sipping our drinks and feeling the pulsating jets on our genital and anal areas. These jets are plentiful, and I move over so that the blue pulsating jet hits my clitoris and my anus. The feeling is making me cum instantaneously.

I move closer to my partner and have him place his anus on a great spot, where the jet is gushing water gently up his ass and around the taint. I gently stroke him and lick the very tip of his dick, he gushes himself. Right up and back into my throat, his salty liquid spurts and he groans so loud, I think he’ll wake my neighbors up. This hot-tub has been our physical and emotional therapy and he is hydro-addicted, so am I.

If you are living in a place without a back-yard paradise, you can explore with your partner in other ways. Set the mood with candle-light, play some sexy R&B music and gently massage your partner with massage oil. Loosen up your partner by lightly touching the anal area with lube and gently place your fingers around the anal area.   Do not insert your finger or other objects until you are certain that your partner is relaxed and wanting more anal insertion. Once you insert gently go in and out of the anus and add more lube. You can perform oral sex on your partner while gliding the object or finger, into the anal area.  Try a vibrator, metals, and lube to gently arouse your partner.

A great implement my partner loves, and one in which I used with my sub, is a metal prostate massager. I prefer to have my partner in doggy style on all 4’s. After using lube, gently massage his anus, balls, and taint, sensually and slowly push into the anus. Whispering into his ear, take your nails and scratch lightly down their back until you scratch and cup their ass.  Stroke or lick your partner, use the metal prostate massager and pulse in and out while stroking their genitals. Faster and faster, pick up the pace until the suspense reaches into a crescendo. As they cum, continue pulsing in and out until they plead to stop.   

Vibrators are a phenomenal invention, and one in which can be used to enhance anal stimulation. Use a medical grade silicone vibrator that has 8 speeds and different pulses, for ideal sensations. Roll the vibrator onto his balls, up and down their dick. Place lube onto another vibrator and place it around and rim him on his anus. Drip lube down towards the anus, and use it to slide the second vibrator up, past their nerve endings while you are still vibrating the balls. Slowly push the vibrator up and down, in short bursts at first, then keep pick up the stride. You can tease your partner by just going really slow and stay there at that pace. Let your partner have a friend to suck them off while you pulse and pulse into an explosion.

The best product for couple’s play is the BDS&M bear and this product is awesome for anal play. Place the bear on its back. A guy can sit on the BDS&M bear’s strap-on vibrating dildo, while your partner uses the bear’s vibrating muzzle either on their pussy or their balls. While you face each other play with each other’s nipples, suck your necks, kiss so sweetly. Pump on the bear facing each other and watch your happy, satisfied, and elated faces show pleasure. Keep touching and kissing until you both are on the brink of cumming. Before you cum do the thing you love the most, whether you love oral sex, anal sex, missionary style, or any type of swinging sex, or do it all to really go full circle.

During this home alone, un-precedented time, use it to your advantage. Take the time to explore things you have never tried. Do things that are taboo, that are alluring, things that you have heard your friends try and read about. Use all internal resources that are available to you. Order online products that are different and unusual. Experiment with different rooms and places inside your place. Try different furniture, different positions, and different approaches. Let’s make this terrible time in the human race to reignite our passion and feelings for each other and ourselves. Let’s be inquisitive and investigate our bodies and our partners’ bodies. Discovering our pleasures is so essential during this internal reflection period and releasing serotonin and endorphins will help release our stress, depression, and anxiety. We need to be sexually engaged and experiment. It is the human race’s way to self-preserve and protect our survival. Think about sex this way, we need to preserve our species, so more the better.

Men will have the most unbelievable orgasm and women will too with anal play during our home-alone social distancing era. Try our products to enhance your shelter-in-place pleasure palace on https//


Dr. Wendy Adams

CEO-Teddy Love

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