Ask Wendy: About Sexual Fetishism

by Wendy Adams on April 21, 2020

Fetishism had been described by Sigmund Freud as eroticism derived from body parts and/or inanimate objects (Katka, 2010).  Apparently, there were references to Fetishes in the late 1800s by sexologists, but my inclination is to believe that sexual fetishes were explored when Neanderthals roamed the earth.  I conjure up images of “Cavey” dragging “Ms. Cavey” by her wildly matted, long, hair; possibly using a club on her head, all the while wearing his fashionable, furry-wear.  If that doesn’t sound kinky, I don’t know what will.

As we explore the underworld of fetishes, it seems that anything goes.  Let’s see, the last Fem/Dom party I went to I had a blast.  I love to flog and be flogged, but got my hands on a pretty caustic whip and heads were rolling, literally.  We’ll refer to it as a reverse “Cavey”, and somehow the whip disappeared after one of the mistresses got concerned that I was whipping too many, too hard.  It was  like the wild, west at this function.

 No need to worry, I got my hands on a paddle and a flogger so pleasure and pain were inflicted, non-the-less.  To my chagrin, an 88 year old cantor attended, so I lightened up my thrusts on him so I didn’t break his tiny hips.  Some subs were wrapped in saran wrap and couldn’t use their hands or arms, while they were being hit, whipped, and “humiliated”.  This was not sexual in nature but something more related to foreplay.  They loved the treatment and now I understand why my husband has been married to me for 25 years, it hurts so good…. I guess. 

There was another sub that had complete sensory deprivation.  His head was covered with a black hood, where his nose holes allowed him to breath, and he had ear plugs in so he couldn’t hear a thing.  His hands were covered with leather mitts and he wasn’t allowed to touch anything.  The only thing that was exposed was his genital area, so I couldn’t resist giving him a little whip on his balls and dick as I was going to town hittingng 7 other men, all in a circle.  That was pretty cool to see his unexpected, shocked, flinching reaction.

My husband sat there, watching with a huge grin on his face and hard on in his package.  I wondered why does he derive such pleasure from seeing this display of public “torture?”  Well, the only rationale I can provide is that he is just so happy that he isn’t the recipient of my displeasure and others are!

Scorolli, Ghirlanda, Enquist, et. al., (2007) in their study revealed that fetishes of the sexual ilk were those related to the body (ex. Foot Fetishes) or objects related to the body (ie women’s underwear).  I am sure that there are innumerable fetishes out there that are expressed and hidden.  One that I recently saw was a cross-dressing man that liked to wear garters and stockings with his ball sack hanging out, bouncing on a big exercise ball, while pushing balloons up his anus.  Then there is clowning, which seems really fun too.  There is so much to explore in the fetish universe that I can’t wait to try everything, it is exhilarating.  Visit my on-line store to see some great merchandise for kinky and playful couples like our metal products, TEDDY LOVE BEAR, and vibrators:   

Feel free to use my work by citation.

Love, Sex and Fun,

Wendy Adams 



Kafka, M. P. (2010). The DSM diagnostic criteria for fetishism. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 39(2), 357-62. doi:

Scorolli, C., Ghirlanda, S., Enquist, M., Zattoni, S., & Jannini, E. A. (2007). Relative prevalence of different fetishes. International Journal of Impotence Research, 19(4), 432-7. doi:
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